Five Contributory Factors that go to generate Script - Parental Directives
Understanding Script
Abstract: Script may be a winner or loser script. It is limiting because it denies capacity for autonomy. Script performs the important functions of structuring time and motivating living. Script is psycho-cybernetic because its goal controls epoch, process, method, mode and flow of its progress. Winner scripts are rewarding. Loser scripts lead to failure, loss, hurt relationships, harm to self or to another, dent to self worth and self-esteem.This blog covers the first of five factors that generate script.
Berne mentions that five contributory factors go to generate script. They are (1) Parental directives (2) A suitable personality development (affording a suitability for flow of thinking, attaching meaning and reaching conclusions leading to the script decision) (3) A childhood decision (4) A real turn-on to a particular method of success or failure (it shows up as a provocation) and (5) A convincing attitude or a credible stance (an attitude or bent of mind that one protects, justifies and professes - this may be for good, for worse, or displaying helplessness). (Berne E. What Do You Say After You Say Hello - Chapter 3)
We should choose not to blame our parents for the circumstances of our life. Our parents innocently did parenting because their role was structured by beliefs that were incorporated into their personality. The parenting of we three brothers happened in three different ways. The attitude, treatment and upbringing meted out by our parents for us was individually different. I have come to know this through questioning them. While our general orientation is identical our behavioural patterns are very different from each other. These are as far apart as north from south.
Parental directives: The nature and impact of taming is covered in the previous blog. While the parents may give out the defining verbal directives, the accompanying non-verbal contents - facial expressions, gesticulate expressions and tonal quality) have an impacting influence on the child’s conclusion as to its meaning. They are displayed through the process of scripts - until, after, never, always, almost, open-ended. (This is an added aspect of process script. TA literature concerns itself with process of script in the context of counter-script messages.) Some persons may reverse, alter, defy parental directives. However, doing so installs another set of directives that structure their lives. These directives get persons to define their own value, worth, dignity and self-esteem, their capacity to deal with others, and their capacity to deal with events, occurrences, happenings in the environment. You can enjoy life after you have brought up your children and fulfilled all your responsibilities. You are the saviour of our clan. You are one who has to offer his life to the service of the nation. Life for our family is one big job. We are a cursed clan and therefore we can never make it though we are highly gifted. Learn to be happy in all circumstances and thus you will get to enjoy your life - unlike me! These are examples of how we happen to attach meaning to what our parents said to us. This scripting results in psychopathology because our the Child conclusions are reinforced by Parent beliefs leading to double contamination.
The next contributory factor - a suitable personality development - will be covered in the next blog.
This is a blog by:
Ajit Karve
+919822024037
ajitpkarve@gmail.com
taforyouandme@gmail.com
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